From Fighting to Forgiveness: Excellence in Motion at Executive Martial Arts
"I definitely thought it was just going to be punching, kicking, stuff like that. But it is really a more personal thing where it affects your mind. It's not just a physical journey, it's a mental journey."
That is one of eight youth interns reflecting on their recent experience at Executive Martial Arts. They walked in expecting a martial arts class, and they walked out talking about forgiveness, breathing, cooperation, and what they want to do with their lives.
Carlton Boleyjack, founder of the youth program Excellence in Motion, brings a group of interns to train with R. Christopher Garland at Executive Martial Arts on Charlotte Pike every summer. "This is my third time bringing a group of youth to work with Mr. Chris Garland here at Executive Martial Arts," Carlton says.
Why Carlton Brings Them: Self-Defense Plus De-Escalation
Carlton is not vague about what he is after. He brings the interns for self-defense training, and for what he calls mindfulness, which can also be described as de-escalation training: Situational awareness, handling conflict, and knowing how to defend yourself only if someone else escalates first.
When most people hear "martial arts" they only picture the first half of it. “Martial.” But there’s a lot behind the word “Art”. The word “Art” exists inside of the words “Heart”, “Hearth”, and “Earth” - this is no accident. As the mats teach the body (Earth), the talks around the mats are where a young person hears somebody explain power, and regret, and cooperation (from the Heart), and why you breathe together as a group, with neurons wiring and firing together collectively (Hearth) as you commit to facing fears, rising to the occasion, and overcoming obstacles across all the terrains of life. The mat is literally a place to learn patterns of movement and repose - and it’s also an analogy for all areas in your life where conflict occurs, and how you can resolve that conflict.
This is what Hapkido means - Hap (Harmonizing), Ki (Energy), Do (The Way). The Way of Harmonizing Energy.
Kicking The 500-Pound Bag
The longest story belongs to one intern and a bag he wasn’t able to kick over… at first.
"I was kicking, trying to kick down a 500-pound bag. I couldn't do it at first and I needed help… [Coach Garland] taught me to cooperate with others to get it down. Two days later, after all the talks we did about power, I learned to breathe and I told myself that I could do it. Two days later, I was able to do it all on my own. And it made me feel good because I was the only one able to kick it down."
Read the order of operations there. First, he couldn’t do it. Second, he learned to ask other people for help. Third came the talks about power. Then breathing. Then telling himself he could do it. The kick came last.
Fitness is more than physical. That is a kid narrating his own process out loud, two days after he lived it. Cooperate first. Ask for help. Breathe. Then learn do it yourself. That is an entire curriculum of its own.
And notice what the bag taught first: Cooperation before applying power. A young person hit a limit, admitted it out loud, and accepted help from the people standing next to him. That’s a skill that doesn’t always come easy. Once it settles in the heart and the mind, the technique in the body clicks into place much more naturally.
Nothing about the bag changed. It still weighed 500 pounds. The student changed.
That is the lesson underneath every good martial arts program: a wall you cannot move today is not permanent. It is just today's wall. And what you do in your heart and mind today will appear in your body tomorrow.
Wisdom Appears On The Mat
One intern found the fear had quietly gone missing:
"I always had a fear of heights, but when we had to walk the plank, I didn't feel any fear. I felt really confident getting up there."
Another intern found a wall that had nothing to do with the body at all. Coach Garland had been talking about forgiveness:
"Whenever he talked about forgiveness and regret and the anger that people feel, it really hit hard because I have struggled to forgive people before. And whenever I did forgive them, it did get a lot better."
For one young woman, the wall was about her own standing in the world, and it turned into something bigger before she finished the sentence:
"As a girl, knowing how to fight back, but also being strong, knowing what you want and getting it."
One intern quoted his mother and then respectfully took the other side:
"My mom always said wisdom comes with age, but I disagree. Wisdom does not necessarily come with age, it comes with experience. And you're able to pass on to the next generation."
For another, the days on the floor reached past the floor entirely:
"The program has really helped me as far as figuring out what I want to do for my future."
Being Available Is Its Own Kind Of Teaching
One line in the video is not about a bag or a plank or a technique. It is about a person being there.
"And he's always available, which is important in someone's life. And if you hit rock bottom, he's always the person you can come up to."
That is the key to success: having someone willing to standing with you and give their presence, when you hit a personal limitation, and help you
Carlton put it plainly at the end:
"The kids love coming here, they love spending time with Chris. And I enjoy it myself, I always learn stuff. And it's a great, safe environment."
Training at Executive Martial Arts
Executive Martial Arts sits at 6410 Charlotte Pike, Suite 107, in West Nashville. If you are looking at martial arts for your kid, you are probably picturing the punching and the kicking too. That is why a lot of people walk in the door, but they stay for the upgrades.
Nobody here will tell you the bag gets lighter. It does not. You get stronger, you learn to breathe, and you learn who to ask for help. Then one day you walk back in and kick the thing down by yourself.
This transfers to everything else in life, as it should.
Ready to find out what kicking over a 500-pound bag represents for your life?